Power-over and its associated power-under is so toxic to the nervous system over time that it can literally throw your life into suspended animation, resulting in the inability to move on to more healthy social territory. Sin projection, fault finding, sexual harassment, being dumped with a superior’s workload, bullying, parasitism, codependent manipulation, enabling or whatever form the power differential takes wears away at our moral fiber. Our growth and motivation becomes so stunted that it takes superhuman strength to break the spell and recover our dignity enough to leave.
Because of the breakdown of the neuroendocrine system within hierarchical power structures that reduce the creativity and dignity of both top and bottom dog it is obvious that these animal based forms of social discourse are incompatible with an evolving humanity. This corrosive social dis-ease perpetuates itself in a zillion permutations throughout our life if conscious attention is not bought to the origins of sovereign boundary infringement and the freeze response it creates. Obviously the greatest imprinting influences on our psyche were the degree of equity our parents achieved in their relationship, and our birth order with regard to our siblings.
It is the combination of parental equity AND birth order that counts. For if the parents are not on a conscious even playing field with regards to freedom, finances and awareness, then the subordinate (usually the mother) will impart inclusion/exclusion influences and play favorites with her children in order to make herself feel more secure. This leaves both the preferred and the unpreferred child with deep unconscious scaring around the need to be "good, accepted, valued and preferred." Thus essentially stealing the child's soul to serve the egoic and deficiency needs of the parents. The children then become borderline and are condemned to focus on outer value judgment and competition having never been granted the right to exist in their own right, but were always “compared” rather than loved. Being “compared” with others rather than simply “appreciated” for being ourselves is the very bedrock foundations of the colossal aberration of Borg civilization.
We arrive in a world somewhat as a tabula rasa (blank slate) within pre-existing karmic drama, which we must learn then to deal with on our own from the get-go. The vulnerability of this innocent unsophistication means that the first defense we achieve against the terror of not being treated with love and respect is to “freeze. “ That is to depress, desensitize, devitalize, dull, frustrate, incapacitate, lessen, mute, numb, and paralyze ourselves. This reduction in feeling, emotion and consciousness lessens the pain and the shear terror of oblivion, of not being seen, met...of not “Being” on the deepest level. Having been born into a presovereign culture we are not granted a unique spirit and acknowledged as an independent entity with equal rights and protections. For in our in tabula rasa state we only really know ourselves through the responses and eyes of others. In order to rise above the freeze response with regard to toxic power differential we must come to really know ourselves beyond the responses and eyes of others.
Since the freeze response is an “absence” that produces the suspended animation and disanimation of our being, we may become spellbound and stopped in our tracks, unable to move away from the hegemonic, subversive, predatory or parasitic forces that ensnare us. Disanimating means to deprive of spirit, to dishearten, the privation of life, to discourage, or the depression of spirits. It takes spirit to BE spirit rather than a slave to the reality and dictates of others. If we are looking for anything FROM the world we will be screwed and turned upside down. Meeting the world from a prior existing fullness, then we are free from the push-pull of chaos, hunger and horrendous distress.
Knowing ourselves through Other can only lead to endless distraction, disaster and wasted life. Thus the sovereign must reach inward to the place where the first impulses for “outer fulfillment” arose. As we feel into the gapping wound of our unloved, unseen infant we can fill this void with light, love and warmth. This fundamental separation, discord and confusion is undone once the individual stops looking for connection, validation, security, love, approval etc...on the outside, and instead gives these to their self. The freeze response absolutely MUST be bled off through aerobic exercise and rigorous physical activity like running, gymnastics, boxing, wrestling, judo, Brazilian jujitsu, karate, taekwondo, jumping, weightlifting, throwing, and swimming.
The physical exercise reduces the cortisol damage and produces the hormones and neurotransmitters that feed personal drive, dignity and life! If the body's generative powers are at optimum, disorder and chaos do not have the upper hand. Lest we be held in permanent bondage to our oppressors in a deathly, frozen, apoplectic, lifeless standstill…we must shake, rattle and roll! Stoic pride in our ability to handle abuse is merely a lack of self-love. For if we really loved ourselves and life itself we would not allow ourselves to be stalled, standing static in stagnant waters, deadlocked in a deathly game of self-abandonment.
Taking in the Good
"We are constantly trying to look behind ourselves and around ourselves to find security, whereas our security is in the blooming of our creation." Andreas Mannal.
Joseph Goldstein's emphasis on "taking in the good," points to the rewiring of insecure and negative patterns in the brain through deliberate self-directed mindfulness. This helps overcome the brain's negativity bias that has resulted from eons of evolutionary survival. Taking in the good, through the felt-sense of unconditional pleasure and well-being helps to reshape our implicit memory and cellular frequency to counter this negativity bias. Continually remembering and poising to "take in the good" throughout the day, in association with the relaxing the tongue and the inner smile, savoring and sustaining the feeling tone of positive experience, puts us increasingly in a regenerative and receiving state in which wholebrain and visionary consciousness is our native state along with enhanced neuroplasticity and quality of life.
In association with the “audacity” to claim dominion over our own feeling state and our peptides of emotion is the “mindfulness” needed to cultivate higher feeling tones than those we were habituated to while we were still highly reactive to the society around us. Toward this end for a time we need to focus on the practice of “Taking in the Good.” We have no choice but to opt for cellular appreciation of the Good, for we know that everything we do to try and make ourselves feel secure using primitive irrational means, only makes us feel less secure. Security is an inside job! Salvation has never been closer at hand than now. Only in this moment can we come home to receive our Self.
Social toxic shock takes All our energy just to tread water and stay afloat. Thus we must systematically overcome our addiction to the terror and betrayal of socio-pain in order to regrow our own sovereign neuroendocrine system that is transcendent of our negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset. We can use “Taking in the Good” practice, and rigorous exercise, Phi-energizing lifestyle, the Inner Arts and enlightened community to evolve beyond our reactivity to not being acknowledged as a sovereign and AWAKE HUman BEing. People will only feel they can pull one over on us if we are too asleep to protest and cry fowl, or too apathetic to step out of harms way.
If we consistently put ourselves in harms way, and become perennially distracted by chasing after figments of acceptability, and acting out the unpreferred child's dire need to be "good, valued and preferred”...we remain in a permanent toxic shock syndrome throughout our life. We retrigger ourselves again and again if we seek and outer security and outer confirmation of self-worth. Thus a consciously applied practice of free expression, coordination, insight and felt-sense meditation and the whole smorgasborg of regenerative and sovereign arts and sciences is needed to take full control of our mind to realize our Always Already Wholeness, and stop our decent into the quagmire of Borg supremacy.
The inner child is not so much wounded as he or she is lonely for us to get out of our own way and come home to the pleasure of the alchemical marriage within. That is why sovereignty is the only real spirituality because only we can build enough trust and faith between our adult and our inner child...only we ourselves can reach across the divide of self-abandonment. If we attempt to get help to form this inner connection then we are indebted and dependent on Other. The nature of communion is that it is solely our unique divine spark that must reach out and volunteer to come into atunement with the Uni-Verse. You can thus see that in order to achieve spiritual satisfaction and satiation with the light we must "drop" our pain, hurt, resistance, and anger at never have been spiritually "met." As we fill up on the mana of our Self we loosen the bondage of "isms"...of gender, race, class, country, species that have locked us into a certain pattern of repetitive nightmare. Once we have met and accepted our Self, we can then offer this greatest of gifts to others…of actually seeing them.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YcgNJ7cgDVs“When you are in that place, and I am in that place in me then we are One!” Namasté